RESOLVING CONFLICTS IN THE OFFICE

Transcription

1 ERI Safety Videos Videos for Safety Meetings 2707 RESOLVING CONFLICTS IN THE OFFICE Leader s Guide 2007 Marcom Group Ltd.

2 Background Conflict in the workplace is inevitable. Anytime two or more individuals come together, they will eventually disagree about something. It is a fact of life, and something that we need to accept... conflict happens. While some conflict can be healthy, often it is an indication that there is something wrong. It can erupt as a warning that there may be trouble ahead if the situation does not get resolved. Conflict is frequently a "call to action"... a problem crying out for a solution. The good news about conflict is that it is usually based on "caring". The more someone defends their point of view in an argument, the more they care. This means that they have a lot to gain from resolving the disagreement. But if conflict is allowed to fester and grow without a resolution, it can be very harmful. If it is not addressed, conflict can lead to serious problems, such as threats and even physical violence. The effectiveness of an entire organization can be harmed if a conflict is allowed to escalate. Long-term relationships can be damaged, and people not directly affected by the conflict may be forced to pick sides. There are many techniques and strategies that can be used to limit the damage and disruption conflict can potentially cause in the workplace. When difficult situations are handled in a calm and unemotional way, compromise and collaboration are possible. As people develop skills to actively listen and keep communication open, everyone can learn how to create "win-win situations"... and conflict resolution can become a positive force in the workplace. Objectives This education and training program reminds employees that they can help to limit and resolve conflicts in the workplace. It discusses what can lead to conflict, and how conflicts can be dealt with constructively and resolved. Upon completion of the program, employees should: Understand the common causes of conflict and be able to recognize them in the workplace. Know how to diffuse disagreements before they get out of hand. Understand the consequences of conflict and how it can severely disrupt the workplace. Recognize the damage that escalating conflict and violence can do to an organization. Understand how collaboration can be a valuable tool in dealing with conflicts. Be able to apply proven conflict resolution techniques and strategies to situations that threaten to escalate. Understand that resolving workplace conflict is an integral part everyone's job. Structuring the Presentation In conducting this education session, you should proceed with a friendly and helpful attitude. Remember that the "trainees" are looking to your experience and knowledge to help them relate to the situations shown in the program. It is important to let the trainees interact with you and each other during the training session. Stimulating conversation within the group is one of the best things you, as the presenter of the program, can do to help everyone get as much as possible from the session. Be alert for comments that could help in this area in future sessions and make note of them. As the presenter, you also should:

3 Keep the session related to the topic of conflict resolution. Relate discussions to how to resolve conflict, and what steps employees can take to limit conflict and make their workplace more productive. Keep any one person or small group of employees in the session from doing all the talking. Get everyone involved. Ask questions of those who don't participate voluntarily. Clarify comments by relating them to the key points in the program. Use the "Outline of Major Program Points" section in this guide, as well as the information included in the quiz, as the basis for answering any questions. If you don't know the answer, say so. Tragic results may occur should you provide incorrect or inaccurate information. Remember, this is a positive program on conflict resolution. Make sure your attitude and words reflect this, and that the emphasis is always on providing the information needed by the attendees to help to prevent conflict from escalating into potentially dangerous situations. Setting Up the Class and Classroom Remember, there are a number of things that must be done to "set up" the class as well as the classroom. These fall into several groups of activities, and include: $ Scheduling and Notification C Use the enclosed form to schedule employees into the session. C Make sure that the session is scheduled so that it fits into your attendees' work day. C Send out notification of the session well in advance, to give people enough time to incorporate it into their schedule for that day. C If possible, post a notification on bulletin boards in the affected employees' areas. $ The Classroom C Schedule the room well in advance. C Make sure the room can accommodate the expected number of attendees. C Check it again on the day of the program to make sure there is no conflict. C Make sure the room can be darkened, and won't create a glare on the television screen. C Locate the light controls and test them. C Make sure the power for the videotape or DVD player you are using operates separately from the room light. C See if you can control the room temperature. C Know where the closest restrooms are. C Assure that the room is free from distracting noises. C Make sure emergency exits are marked and known to the attendees. $ Seating C Make sure everyone can see the screen from their seat. C Make sure everyone can hear the videotape/dvd and you (when you speak). C Check to see that seating is such that writing can be done easily. C Make sure the seating arrangement allows eye contact between attendees,

4 and between you and attendees. $ Equipment and Materials C Make sure the videotape/dvd player, monitor, and all appropriate cables and extension cords are available. C Make sure a stand or table is available and is of appropriate height for all attendees to easily see the monitor. C If you plan on using a chart pad, blackboard, or other writing board, make sure it is available, easy to see, and you have the proper writing implements. C Make sure you have 6" x 8" index cards or other materials to be used as "name tents" for attendees. C Make sure you have made up a sufficient number of copies of the quiz, as well as any other handouts you are using. $ "Final Check" C Make sure equipment is in the room prior to the scheduled session. C Make sure you have the right program. C Check to see that the room is set up properly. C Check equipment prior to the presentation to assure that it works. C Make sure extension cords, etc. are "taped down", if need be, to avoid tripping. C If you are using the videotape version of the program, run the "leader" up to the point where the program begins.

5 The Initial Steps CONDUCTING THE SESSION In conducting the session remember the positive nature of this presentation. Everyone is attending in order to learn more about how to resolve conflict in the workplace. Initially, you need to: $ Introduce yourself as the session leader. $ State the title of the program, "Resolving Conflicts in the Office" and the purpose of the session (to learn about how to deal with conflict as productively as possible). $ Inform the attendees when there will be breaks (if you plan them) the location of exits and restrooms, and if water, coffee, or other refreshments will be available. $ Make sure all of the attendees have "signed in" on your scheduling and attendance sheet. Remember, it is very important to document peoples' attendance at the session. Once this housekeeping is done, it is time to move to the "meat" of the session. First, the attendees need to be informed about the objectives of the session (this is where you can use a flip chart or board to list the objectives, which should be done prior to the class starting). This listing should be preceded with some introductory remarks. Your own words are always best, but the remarks should include information such as the following paragraphs: "Conflict in the workplace is inevitable. Each of us will disagree with coworkers from time to time. We all have our own points of view... and our own set of values. Sometimes they don't fit with other people's. But it is how we manage this conflict that makes the difference between a productive, safe workplace and a hostile, stressful one." "Under the right circumstances, conflict can actually be a good thing. It is a chance to get differences out in the open and deal with them directly. Resolving conflict productively is one of the most valuable skills we can learn. It should be an integral part of all of our jobs." "But none of us wants to feel like we have to constantly 'watch our backs' or worry about a physical confrontation. That is why it is so important to quickly and effectively deal with differences that come up between us. We can not afford to disrupt our workplace with screaming matches or <fights=. Not only can someone get hurt, but all of our work will suffer." "The program we are going to watch today provides a lot of good information about how to resolve conflict. To make this the most productive session possible, we need to look at what we want to accomplish here today (verbally reference the 'Objectives' list from the first section in this guide or point to the blackboard or chart where you have written them down.)" Once the objectives have been provided, you are ready to show the program. However, you do need to let the attendees know that they will be taking a quiz at the end of the session (if you are using it). It needs to be emphasized that they are not being "graded," but that the quiz is being used to see if the session is effectively transmitting information to them in a way they will remember. At this point, you need to introduce the title of the program once again, "Resolving Conflicts in the Office", darken the lights if necessary, and begin the showing of the program.

6 Conducting the Discussion After the program has been shown, it is time for the group discussion on the information contained in the session. Care must be taken to make sure that the discussion is kept to the general topic of maintaining a productive workplace and how to resolve conflict. There are several ways to conduct this discussion. These include: $ Calling for questions from the attendees and using these questions as the basis for the discussion. $ Leading the discussion through the points covered in the program using statements such as: "One of the sections in the program discussed how conflict can actually be a good thing when it is handled properly. Who can explain why?" "We saw an interesting sequence about the role of 'body language' during a confrontation. Who can tell us how we should position ourselves when confronted by a person who is angry?" You should use the discussion format that you are most comfortable with. The "Outline of Major Program Points" section in this guide, and the questions and answers in the master copies of the quiz can be very useful as a basis for discussion. Remember, you have allocated a limited amount of time in which this discussion can take place. It is important to blend the attendees' questions and areas of obvious interest with the objective of trying to touch on each major area within the session in the discussion. By touching on each area, the attendees are much more likely to retain the information presented in the session. Concluding the Presentation Once discussion has concluded, whether naturally or you have had to bring the discussion to a close in order to complete the session within the time allowed, it is time to give the quiz (if you are using it). Again, remind the attendees that the quiz is only meant to help determine how effective the presentation of the information is, and that they will not be graded on it. Let them know that they have approximately five minutes to complete the quiz. At the end of the five minute period, remind the attendees to date and sign their quizzes, and then collect them. The attendees should be thanked for attending the session and reminded of any other sessions in the educational program that they may be attending. They can then be dismissed to return to their normal activities.

7 OUTLINE OF MAJOR PROGRAM POINTS The following outline summarizes the major points of information presented in the program. The outline can be used to review the program before conducting a classroom session, as well as in preparing to lead a class discussion about the program. We have all seen two or more people: Disagreeing. Arguing. Fighting. There is one word that sums it all up... "Conflict". It can be an obstacle to doing our jobs. It can make our work environment feel uncomfortable... even hostile. Left unresolved, it can lead to more serious problems such as harassment and violence. However, if it is handled properly, conflict can actually be a good thing. It can bring forth new: Ideas. Perspectives. Ways to get our jobs done. "Conflict resolution" can be a powerful force for positive change. Where does conflict come from? There are a number of different sources of conflict. They all have one thing in common... "differences". Differing "expectations" about job roles or instructions can be a source of conflict. Disagreements can include: "Who is responsible for what?" "What is the proper procedure? "Differences in "treatment", even if only perceived, can lead to arguments over status or resources. Questions that are not easily resolved include: "Who is more important?" "Who gets 'first dibs' on equipment or materials?" People can often find themselves in conflict with one another because they have different: Goals. Values. Priorities. Other conflicts can arise from deeply embedded differences in: Habits. Feelings. Beliefs. Even "old" conflicts that everyone thought had been resolved can come back to haunt us. Many times holding a grudge about past disagreements can cause or

8 complicate new conflicts. However, there is almost always some way a conflict can be resolved. Understanding each type of conflict can help us find ways to deal with them. A common category of conflict is... "Misunderstandings". Confusion over incorrect, outdated or vague information or instructions can lead to conflict. When people develop different "understandings" of the same situation, the best response is to establish common ground and to provide everyone with information that is: Reliable. Accurate. Current. But even with the most up-to-date facts and figures, people can still disagree about what they really mean. In these cases, engaging in friendly debate over the disagreement can often lead to a resolution. Sometimes it may be necessary to "agree to disagree" and move on. "Procedural Conflicts" are about "different means to the same end." People can agree on a common goal, but still disagree on how to get there. When there is more than one way to complete a task, a compromise that incorporates parts of each plan can often be reached. Conflicts can be far more difficult to resolve if the individuals or groups who are involved each have "Differing Goals". This can sometimes feel like a "no-win" situation. However, these situations can often be turned into "win-win" situations through "Collaboration". Few goals are truly mutually exclusive. By working together to reach different goals, conflicting parties can often resolve their differences. Over the years, conflict has gotten a "bad rap". It can actually be very valuable. If handled properly, conflict can be a source of innovation and positive change. How we resolve conflict is the key. There isn't one sure-fire conflict resolution strategy that will work in every situation. There are several different approaches... each with its own pluses and minuses. Which one we should use depends on the specifics of the situation at hand. One strategy some people use is to "Compete" with the other party... fighting for the outcome that they want. While this approach is very assertive, it shows little concern for others.

9 If you win, you will get what you want... but the losers will be unhappy. They may hold a grudge which could contribute to future conflict. If the other party chooses to compete as well, they could end up winning. You would have nothing to show for your efforts. If the situation ends in a tie, everyone loses because no one achieves their goal. Another approach to conflict resolution is to "Yield" and let the other person get their way. Your needs definitely won't get satisfied this way. However, if you feel threatened by the conflict, or just have more important things to do, yielding can gave its advantages. The major drawback to yielding is that you may regret it later. You can end up feeling bitter or angry for giving up what you wanted. An approach that is similar to yielding is simply to "Avoid" the conflict. Some examples include: Looking the other way. Refusing to talk about it. Passing the buck to someone else. Avoidance can reduce your frustration and free you up to deal with other things. But avoiding conflict is no substitute for resolving it once and for all. These strategies all fall short of bringing lasting resolution to conflict. As long as someone's needs or concerns go unfulfilled or unaddressed, conflict can still exist. There are two other approaches to resolving conflict which can have more lasting results. "Compromise" makes sure that everyone who is involved gets at least some of what they want. When each party "gives a little to get a little", they can often meet halfway to resolve a conflict. Compromising is about weighing priorities. Each party must decide what they are willing to give up in order to get other things they want. Most people are willing to budge on some issues. You then need to work together to identify "common ground", the things that you agree on. Start there and negotiate. Trade your lesser priorities for higher ones. Eventually you will reach a compromise. When two or more parties agree on a compromise, each sees at least some of their needs being met. This can often bring long-term resolution to a conflict. However, compromise does not always completely satisfy all parties. Sometimes people have second thoughts about the things they gave up in

10 the negotiations. The conflict could erupt again... or other problems might develop as a result of "hard feelings". While compromise may be the only solution to conflicts over "mutually exclusive" goals, few situations actually fall into that category. Many different goals can often be reached simultaneously if people work together... or "Collaborate". To "collaborate", you should be assertive about satisfying your concerns but you must also cooperate to see that other people's needs are being fulfilled at the same time. Start by defining the problem as mutual something that belongs to everyone involved. Then look for a solution which satisfies everyone's needs. Collaboration is one of the few approaches that can resolve a conflict once and for all. When you collaborate everyone sees their needs met or their goals reached. Although this may take some time and energy, it is usually worth the effort. Although these strategies may make resolving conflict look easy... there can be complications. If a conflict grows too quickly, or becomes too intense, it can lead to a "confrontation". These situations require special consideration. If a conflict boils over into a confrontation, people may feel like their entire reputation or self-worth is on the line. These situations can be time bombs just waiting to explode. It is important to know how to "defuse" confrontations. When we are confronted, our reflex is often to either fight back or to run away. But neither attacking nor retreating will help to defuse the confrontation. Nor will these approaches resolve the conflict behind the confrontation. It is important to resist these urges and try to work through our differences. Your verbal response to a confrontation can be critical. How you say something is often more important than what you say. Shouting is usually not a productive form of communication. Stay calm and encourage the other party to talk about their concerns. Tell them you want to understand, and ask them to explain their point of view. Don't interrupt. Let them finish, and then show that you do understand by restating their position in your own words. Don't disagree or be judgmental. When it is your turn to talk, use the word "I" instead of the word "You" whenever possible. "I" takes ownership of the situation, and can promote cooperation and

11 understanding. "You" can make your statements sound like accusations and may put the other person on the defensive. But there is more to diffusing a confrontation than just talking a certain way. Your physical response also plays an important role. Knowing how to react physically can prevent further escalation and help to defuse the situation. Remember to stay calm. Keep your arms low, in a non-threatening position. Don't cross your arms, make fists or fidget. Try to stay at least five feet away from the other person. Avoid physical contact. Touching someone who is agitated may upset them further, possibly escalating the confrontation to violence. Make sure not to make them feel threatened or backed into a corner. Don't allow the person you are dealing with to touch you either. They may try to grab or hit you if they are really upset. If they push you, don't push back... it could escalate the confrontation. Instead, just walk away. If the other person grabs you, try to break free and get away from them. If you have to, call out for help... someone is usually nearby. Whatever you do, don't allow yourself to get drawn into a fight. Fighting can lead to all kinds of trouble. You could be: Injured. Disciplined by your employer. Arrested for "Assault". Sued by the other person, no matter who started the fight. If you don't take steps to resolve conflict or diffuse a confrontation there can be serious consequences. Conflict causes stress. Stress leads to frustration. Frustration leads to anger. Anger causes short tempers. It all adds up to more conflict. Another problem is that after prolonged periods of conflict: Your patience may wear thin. You may no longer trust the other party. Communication may stop completely. A stalemate may develop... where no further progress can be made. But "Escalation" is probably the most serious consequence of unresolved conflict. Prolonged conflict can sometimes lead to a confrontation. The nature of the conflict can change and become about placing blame or "getting even".

12 When the goal turns to hurting others, there can be very serious results. The situation can grow into: Harassment. Threats. Even violence. None of us are strangers to conflict... at work or at home. It can be: Unpleasant. Disruptive. Even scary. But because of its potential consequences, we can't allow conflict to continue unchecked for very long. * * *SUMMARY* * * Know how to recognize the common sources of conflict. Compromise when goals are mutually exclusive. Look for ways to collaborate, so that everyone can reach their goals together. Diffuse confrontations with a calm verbal response and a non-threatening physical response. Work to resolve conflict before it escalates into something more serious. In spite of its potential problems, conflict can produce: New ideas. Innovation. Positive change. The key to conflict is in how it is handled. When conflict is resolved properly, everybody wins!

13 QUIZ "RESOLVING CONFLICTS IN THE OFFICE" Name: Date: 1. True or... Conflict is unusual in most workplaces? True 2. True or... "Misunderstandings" often come from vague, outdated or incorrect information? True 3. When handled properly, conflict can produce which of the following: New ideas. Innovations. Positive change. All of the above. 4. True or... Your "physical response" to a confrontation will have more immediate impact than anything you say? True 5. Experts say you should not do which of the following when you are confronted by an angry person? Keep your arms low. Make a fist. Stay calm. Maintain eye contact. 6. True or... "Avoidance" is always the most effective method of resolving a conflict? True 7. True or... Although "compromise" can work, "collaboration" can often be more effective in resolving conflict? True

14 QUIZ "RESOLVING CONFLICTS IN THE OFFICE" 1. True or... Conflict is unusual in most workplaces? True X 2. True or... "Misunderstandings" often come from vague, outdated or incorrect information? X True 3. When handled properly, conflict can produce which of the following: New ideas. Innovations. Positive change. X All of the above. 4. True or... Your "physical response" to a confrontation will have more immediate impact than anything you say? X True 5. Experts say you should not do which of the following when you are confronted by an angry person? Keep your arms low. X Make a fist. Stay calm. Maintain eye contact. 6. True or... "Avoidance" is always the most effective method of resolving a conflict? True X 7. True or... Although "compromise" can work, "collaboration" can often be more effective in resolving conflict? X True