How Remarkable People Show Others They Care and Keep It Simple

Promise Council Pilot Lesson Re 3 markable for Teens How Remarkable People Show Others They Care and Keep It Simple Table of Contents: PREPARING TO FACILITATE... 2 LESSON OVERVIEW... 4 MATERIALS PREPARATION LIST... 7 KEY TO SYMBOLS... 10 DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE... 11 OPENING EXERCISE... 11 TIP ONE.... 13 TIP TWO... 17 TIP THREE... 23 DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO... 27 TIP FOUR... 28 TIP FIVE... 33 TIP SIX... 36 PLUS ONE... 39 CLOSING EXERCISE... 42 Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 1

PREPARING TO FACILITATE: To effectively facilitate these sessions of How Remarkable People Show They Care and Keep it Simple, you will need to do the following. WHEN: 4 weeks prior to the event 3 weeks prior to event 2-3 weeks prior to event 2 weeks prior to event 1 week prior to the event WHAT: The teacher sponsor should: Confirm student facilitators and supply them with the event date and invite them to a facilitator meeting. Send communication to any stakeholders or other guest observers inviting them to the event and asking them to save the date on their calendars. Let them know that you might need them to step in and play a role in some of the scenarios. Include other guidelines you wish to implement to make the event go smoothly for the student facilitators. The teacher sponsor should print out facilitation guides and distribute them to the student facilitators for them to review prior to the next meeting. Review the Facilitator Guide and become familiar with the content of the lesson. The teacher sponsor will meet with the student facilitators to: Review facilitator role expectations and assign facilitation duties for various sections of the lesson. Assign scenario character roles. Feel free to change the gender of the characters as needed. (NOTE: If needed, solicit other stakeholders or observers to act as one or more of the characters until all parts are assigned.) Also, refer to the Scenario Options section on page 4 of this document. Determine who will print needed facilitation documents and how those will get distributed. (Include other school stakeholders, State Farm stakeholders, and other invited guests and observers.) Determine who will print needed event handouts and where those will be stored until the event date. Have all printing completed. Distribute or store according to the plan from previous meeting. Send a reminder communication to all stakeholders, observers, and guests reminding them of the event dates and times. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 2

PREPARING TO FACILITATE (Continued from previous page): WHEN: 6 days prior to the event 5 days prior to the event 4 days prior to the event 2 days prior to the event 2 days prior to the event 1 day prior to the event Morning of the event WHAT: Meet with student facilitators to do a practice session of Day One session. Debrief so students can make appropriate adjustments. Make sure all technology is in place to project the YouTube video at the appropriate time during the event. Work with the school technology area if there are problems. Meet with student facilitators to do a practice session of Day Two session. Debrief so students can make appropriate adjustments. If there were previous technical difficulties, do a test-run of the YouTube video. Conduct a lesson dress rehearsal. Make sure all the student facilitators are comfortable with their roles and section content. Practice the scenarios. Set up all handouts for easy access and quick distribution during the lesson. (Remember to cut the documents that have 2 and 4 handouts per document.) Send a reminder communication to all stakeholders, observers, and guests reminding them of the event dates and times. Send a message to the student facilitators encouraging them and supporting them. Include any needed last-minute reminders. Do one last video test. Make sure handouts are organized and easily accessed during the lesson. Clean the white board. Arrange student desks/chairs for group work. Set up chairs for adult guests and observers. Have student facilitators meet at the event location early to familiarize themselves with the placement of the handouts, how the video will play, and be ready to facilitate without the last-minute busyness that can be caused by arriving too late. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 3

LESSON OVERVIEW (70 total minutes over 2 days) PARTICIPANTS Teacher. Two to four student facilitators. Optional: Other stakeholders such as State Farm employees, Promi5e Council representatives, school administrators. ROLE Train student facilitators prior to event. During event lessons, observe student facilitators (and provide guidance only if absolutely necessary). Facilitate the lesson. Observe student facilitators (and provide guidance only if absolutely necessary). Serve as role-play participants if needed. SCENARIO OPTIONS NOTE: Each lesson section includes a scenario built around the section content. Some are to be presented to the entire class orally, and two are to be read during group exercises. For the scenarios that will be used for whole-class exercises, facilitators have several choices to incorporate these scenarios: Assigned characters can read or act out the scenario roles. A facilitator can tell the scenario in a story format. A facilitator can relay a personal story that relates to the content. Personal accounts can be very effective in relating to the class. DAY ONE SECTION ACTIVITIES (35-minute lesson) MINUTES: LESSON SECTIONS: LESSON DESCRIPTION: 6 Opening exercise: Bring caring to a personal level. 6 TIP ONE: Ask about how I am doing and express empathy before jumping into a conversation. When I feel you are sincerely concerned about me, I will trust you more. Students will collectively brainstorm ways in which teens are sad or depressed. Then they will individually reflect on personal situations and how others showed caring. They will have a chance to voice how they wished someone had showed caring in situations where caring was needed. After listening to two parts of a scenario showing a non-caring greeting and a caring greeting, group members will work together to list ways the noncaring and caring person reacted to a troubled friend and compare those. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 4

LESSON OVERVIEW (Continued from previous page.) 10 TIP TWO: Listen when I m upset and ask appropriate questions to let me know that you are interested. Let me know you re listening and care about why I m upset. 12 TIP THREE: Don t take my friendship and what I do for you for granted. Let me know that you are grateful I m your friend and that I do caring things for you. Students will learn about four easy ways to be good listeners and draft three quality questions to practice good listening skills (based on two parts of a scenario showing good and bad listeners). After listening to two parts of a scenario showing a friend being taken for granted by one friend and then valued by another friend, students will draft other ways they can show others they are appreciated. Students will then watch a YouTube video (approximates 6 minutes long) on how a student chose to show caring to the other students in his new school. Students will verbally share the outcome of this student s actions. DAY TWO SECTION ACTIVITIES (35-minute lesson) MINUTES: LESSON SECTIONS: LESSON DESCRIPTION: 5 TIP FOUR: Let me vent and explain my feelings and be willing to apologize if I feel you ve offended me or hurt me, even if what you said/did wasn t intentional. Let me know that my hurts matter, and if you ve hurt me, even if unintentionally, apologize. 13 TIP FIVE: In challenging situations, remain positive; avoid blaming others, and own the situation. Avoid telling me what won t work or what you can t do, and avoid blaming others. After listening to two parts of a scenario showing how a student was left out of a desired school newspaper position, students will draft two text message of how this student felt after he was heard and acknowledged (leading to a positive and fair solution) and how he would have felt had he not been heard. After reading a scenario together about the girls basketball team using attitude to win a game, they will consider the details of the scenario and identify the 5 Ws (who, what, where, when, why) and H (how). Using these, they will draft an article for the school paper. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 5

LESSON OVERVIEW (Continued from previous page.) 6 TIP SIX: Anticipate my needs and help me find a simple solution. Be proactive to help me find a simple solution, so the task won t have to be redone. 6 PLUS ONE: Know when to involve a trusted adult. When it s no longer simple or I m in danger, be brave enough to get an adult involved. In groups of two, students will read the beginning of a scenario about students who are helping a coach clean up the school s sports equipment room. They will then work with their partners to write an ending that incorporates a simple solution as an example of how the scenario characters could have completed the task without having to redo it. Students will generate a list of trusted adults, as well as a list of situations requiring trusted adults. They will compile and share these with the class, so all students are aware of who can be considered a trusted adult and in what situations it is wise to involve a trusted adult. 5 CLOSING EXERCISE: Students will work alone to draft who their caring role model is and why. Then they will identify ways they can be more caring. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 6

MATERIALS PREPARATION LIST As you use the chart below to prepare the lesson materials, please note the following: DOCUMENT PREPERATION: All prints should be in color. All handouts are housed in the document titled Handouts within Caring/Simple. The facilitator guide and the scenario scripts are in a separate document titled Facilitator Guide within Caring/Simple. VIDEO PREPERATION: Day One includes a YouTube video. Be sure you have proper technology in place to project the video for classroom view when prompted. TYPE NAME OF MATERIAL PPT SLIDE NUMBER SINGLE- or DOUBLE- SIDED QUANTITY DAYS ONE AND TWO: Facilitator Guide How Remarkable People Show They Care and Keep It Simple Facilitator Guide n/a (separate Word document) Double 1 per facilitator plus extras for facilitators and observers DAY ONE: Handout my problem 1 Single/cut into 4 equal cards 1 quarter-sheet per student (1 sheet per 4 students) plus extras for facilitators and observers Display TIP ONE 2 Single 1 per class Handout ask how i m doing 3 Single 1 half-sheet per group (1 sheet per 2 groups) plus extras for facilitators and observers Answer key ask how i m doing 4 Single 1 per facilitator Display TIP TWO 5 Single 1 per class Display be attentive and avoid all distractions 6 Single 1 per class Display show that you are listening 7 Single 1 per class Display don t dismiss the situation as less important 8 Single 1 per class Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 7

MATERIALS PREPARATION LIST (Continued from previous page.) Display Handout Answer key rephrase what you have heard clarifying questions make all the difference clarifying questions make all the difference 9 Single 1 per class 10 Single 1 per student plus extras for facilitators and observers 11 Single 1 per facilitator Display TIP THREE 12 Single 1 per class Handout i appreciate you 13 Single 1 per group Answer key i appreciate you 14 Single 1 per facilitator YouTube video DAY TWO: https://www.youtube.com/wat ch?v=pihtukc3gjg n/a n/a Prepare to project for class viewing Display TIP FOUR 15 Single 1 per class Handout Answer key smile i m on the job!/i m not on the job! smile i m on the job!/ i m not on the job! 16-17 Double 1 per student plus extras for facilitators and observers 18-19 Double 1 per facilitator Display TIP FIVE 20 Single 1 per class Handout scenario 21 Single 1 per group plus extras for facilitators and observers Handout extra! extra! read all about it! 22-23 Double 1 per group plus extras for facilitators and observes Answer key extra! extra! read all about it! 24-25 Double 1 per facilitator Display TIP SIX 26 Single 1 per class Handout scenario 27-28 Double 1 per two students plus extras for facilitators and observers Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 8

MATERIALS PREPARATION LIST (Continued from previous page.) Answer key scenario 29 Single 1 per facilitator Display PLUS ONE 30 Single 1 per class Handout a trusted adult can be 31 Single 1 per group Answer key a trusted adult can be 32 Single 1 per facilitator Handout it s not simple help 33 Single 1 per group Answer key it s not simple help 34 Single 1 per facilitator Handout My caring role model is 35 Single/cut into 4 equal cards 1 quarter-sheet per student (1 sheet per 4 students) plus extras for facilitators and observers Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 9

KEY TO SYMBOLS This guide uses graphic symbols that replace some verbal instructions allowing a quick scan of a page to anticipate activities and instructions. Say what is provided. However, the script is a suggested word track to assist in facilitation. It is not intended to be a verbatim script. Do what the guide instructs. Indicates a question is to be asked or debrief of the material. Indicates a small group exercise. Indicates use of a handout. Indicates a note to the facilitator. Indicates use of the whiteboard. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 10

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE Opening exercise. Welcome to How Remarkable People Show They Care and Keep It Simple. This session is for you to understand why it is important to be a caring person and how to show others you care, as well as keep your approach to situations and others simple. Companies like State Farm are finding they need to teach their employees how to show caring attitudes towards their customers. One of the assistant vice presidents at State Farm, Ed Quijano, wondered if it would be a good idea to share our Re 3 markable training concept with schools, so you can gain these skills earlier in life. These are skills that will benefit you now, as well as in your future. We think your friends want to know you care about them, just like our State Farm customers want to know that State Farm cares about them. You are about to experience how to be more caring towards others. State Farm employees also are asked to keep their interactions with our customers simple. It enhances trust and maintains an efficient work processes. These strategies for interacting with others, are again, strategies you can use now and as you move into adulthood. Before we begin, I d like to introduce myself and the other student facilitator(s). Introduce yourself and the other student facilitator(s). Give your name and grade level. If you d like to give one interesting fact about each facilitator, that s fine. Just agree among yourselves what you will say. This should be very brief, so you can quickly continue with the session. Split the class into four groups. Have each group sit in a cluster to encourage conversation during group activities. Tell the students that throughout the lesson, they will be working both with their groups and individually. Let me ask all of you a question. I want you to think carefully and share your thoughts with the whole class. What kinds of things do your classmates worry about make them sad secretly carry around with them every day things that would make them want a caring friend? Document responses on the white board. Possible answers can include: Test stress Relationships Self-image Abusive home situations Thoughts of suicide Depression Self-harm (like cutting) Drug/alcohol use Death of a loved one Death of a pet Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 11

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE We have a good list here. But I want us to take this to a deeper level. Have you ever noticed some people around you just seem grumpy, depressed, or downright mad all the time? Did you ever wonder why, or do you just dismiss these people to avoid having an uncomfortable interaction? Do you notice when your normally-friendly classmates are out of sorts? Do you know why they seem somber when they are normally upbeat? Some of your friends, maybe even you, suffer from some very serious problems. I know you are thinking, I m young; what can I do? Well, there are simple things you can do to make a difference for someone who is suffering. First, let s go back to our cards. We just brainstormed together to identify possible problems of the students in this school. What problems are specific to you? Think about a problem you had recently and how others helped you through that problem. How others care about you can help you know how to care about others. Perhaps there were things you wished others would do for you but they didn t. This is a learning experience, too. Take some time to reflect and document your thoughts. You will receive a problem card to fill out. Use it to organize your thoughts. Pass out one my problem card to each student. (This should be ¼ of the printed document.) Each of you should have your own card. For this first part, I want you to work alone. On your card, write down a problem you ve had in the past or have now. If there is a friend who tried to help you, write down what they did to be there for you. Also, how would you have liked for them to help you? ((Did they initiate contact? What nonverbal cues (handshake, nod of head, etc.) did they use? Did they smile? Did they give a verbal greeting? What was their tone?)) I want you to be as truthful as possible. Your names won t be on these, so don t hold back. You have 1 minute to work on this, so get started. Think quickly and get some thoughts down. Allow students about 1 minute to work on their lists based on their own life experiences. Remind them to be as personal and truthful as possible. If they cannot (or are uncomfortable) share their own problem, ask them to share a friend s problem. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 12

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE After 1 minute, collect all the cards, shuffle them, and pass out equal numbers to each group. OK. Let s move on and work as groups now. Together, review the cards assigned to your group. Number the cards in order of significance. Which ones are the most common among your peer groups? When you are finished, place them in a stack with number one on top. You have one minute, so again work quickly. Allow students about 1 minute order their cards. Watch the groups and be ready to move on if they complete this task sooner. OK, it looks like everyone has their cards stacked. Now, I d like a spokesperson from each group to tell all of us the problem written on your group s top card. We ll start with the group to my right and move around the room. Please, speak loudly so we can all hear you. Allow each group to share. As you go through each group, there might be duplicate problems. If so, ask the group to share the problem on their second card, and if needed, the third card. Where appropriate, comment on ones that are similar among groups and ones that might be unique. Good job. I think we have a good list of teen problems here. How do you handle it when your friends have one of these problems? Sometimes, as a teen, it s difficult to know what to do. Let s review six simple tips for caring for your friends when they most need it. TIP ONE: Ask how I am doing and express empathy before jumping into a conversation. When I feel you re sincerely concerned about me, I will trust you more. Hang the TIP ONE definition document on front board. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 13

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE Let s dig right in to the first tip. As you can see here, caring people ask how someone is doing before jumping into a conversation. And, if they share something that is bothering them, show appropriate empathy. Strong relationships rely on this type of interaction. Listen to this short scenario, and pay attention to what is being said and how this tip could positively affect the outcome. SCENARIO SCRIPT: Three facilitators or guests play the parts of the narrator, Brittney, and Riley and read the following scenario. (Read with emotion.) PART 1: Narrator: Riley: Brittney: Riley (interrupting): Brittney: Brittney plops down into the bus seat beside Riley. Hey, Britt! As always, saved a seat for my bestie! How s it going? Well, actually, not that great. I am I am so excited about being in the dance-off. You should see my outfit! It arrived in the mail yesterday and fits like it was made for me! And you should see what Steve is going to wear. We are going to be the bestdressed couple there. Oh, I can t wait. The clothes, the decorations, the music, the food. I wouldn t miss this dance for anything. Oh, we re here already. Gotta run and show Steve a pic of my outfit! He s going to love it! I ll see you at lunch later! Um, sure. See ya (under her breath) Wow! So much for bestie! SCENARIO SCRIPT: Three facilitators or guests play the parts of the narrator, Brittney, and Sal and read the following scenario. (Read with emotion.) PART 2: Narrator: Brittney: So, it seems Brittney is a bit deflated by her interaction with Riley. Let s take another look at Brittney as she meets Sal at their lockers. Hey, Sal. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 14

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE Sal (noticing Brittney s somber mood): Brittney (looking relieved): Sal: Brittney: Sal: Brittney: Sal: Hey. I was hoping to talk to you about tryouts, but I can t help noticing you look a little down today. Is there anything I can help you with? Oh, Sal; I m so glad you asked. I could really use a friend right now. I m so bummed. What s up? Well, I got grounded last night. I deserved it, but I m so mad because my parents aren t going to let me participate in the dance-off. The worst part is, I have to tell Max. I m afraid he won t be able to find another partner now. He s going to be so mad at me. I m scared to tell him. Oh, Britt. I don t even know what to say. How can I help? Do you want me to go with you when you tell Max? You d do that for me? Oh, Sal! You don t know how much I needed a good friend this morning! Can you go with me now to find Max? Yup! Now quit worrying. It will all work out somehow. And if Max is mad, he won t be for long. Come on, let s go find Max! I got your back, girl! I d like you to work in groups again. Every group should appoint someone to serve as a scribe, or someone who will write for your group. Pass out one ask how I m doing handout to each group. (This should be half of the printed document.) Every group has an ask how i m doing handout. Your group needs to talk about the two scenarios you just heard and compare and contrast how Riley and Sal handled a troubled friend. Your group s scribe should write down what you thought each did, whether it was good or bad. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 15

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE Be sure your scribe has the handout and is ready to write for your group. You will need to think quickly and work together to make best use of your time, because you will only have 60 seconds. After 60 seconds, I m going to ask you to share your ideas with the class. OK, get ready. Time begins now. Allow students 60 seconds to brainstorm ideas. After 60 seconds, call TIME, and gain their attention. It s time to see what each group has come up with. We ll start with the first group again. Everyone must listen very carefully, because you will need to respond to what this group reports. Allow the first group s scribe to verbally work through the items under Riley s name. As they do so, respond appropriately. As they report their items, write them on the white board. Ask the other groups if they had anything to add to that list. Have the second group do the same for their Sal items. Again, you will record their items on the whiteboard. Ask the other groups if they have anything to add. Respond appropriately to open dialogue on reported items. Let s look at these item lists together. What are the main points we can take away to help you be a Sal? As students suggest items on the board, place a star by them. Respond appropriately. So, as you interact with others, in order to be caring, ask them how they are doing. It doesn t stop with asking. You need to react. Let s move on to Tip Two. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 16

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE TIP TWO: Listen when I m upset and ask appropriate questions to let me know you are interested. Let me know you re listening and care about why I m upset. I want you to stay in your teams. You are going to have to help each other again through this next exercise. But first, let s look at Tip Two. Hang the TIP TWO definition document on front board. There are two key components to this second tip. To show someone you care, you need to listen. After you ve listened and really heard what the person has is saying, respond. An easy way to respond is to ask questions that directly relate to what you have heard. Listening and questioning skills are skills that can be learned by observing others who relate well to other people, and then practicing those skills. As you practice, you will be more comfortable relating to people when they are upset. Before you practice, let s review a few skills that will help you be a good listener. Hang be attentive and avoid all distractions on the front board. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 17

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE We all respond to others in a more positive way when we feel they are sincerely interested in what we have to say. When others are talking to us, especially when they are upset, we need to do more than just hear them. Effective listening, or active listening, means to think about what the person is saying, consider what they are feeling, and react appropriately. Be an empathetic listener and let them know you are truly hearing them. Most importantly, when someone is talking to you, be attentive and avoid distractions to show them you are interested. Eye contact is a good way to show interest. Look at the person, rather than your phone or someone else nearby. When someone is talking to you, your eyes tell them where your attention is focused. Focus on the speaker to let them know you are interested in what is being said. Hang show that you are listening on the front board. Another way to be an empathetic listener is to show the speaker that you are listening. This can be done both verbally and nonverbally. Easy ways to do this are to nod your head, maintain eye contact, and say things like, I understand, uh-huh, or I see. This lets the speaker know you are intent on listening and understanding what is being said. Hang don t dismiss the situation as less important on the board. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 18

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE Please, pay special attention to this next skill for empathetic listening. While you may not want to make your friend feel worse, don t minimize the importance of the situation, even if it doesn t sound that bad to you. The pain of the person speaking to you is very real to them. Understand the level of pain the speaker is relaying and address that. Don t be dismissive and make them feel you aren t really hearing what is being said. Hang rephrase what you have heard on the board. The last way you can be a good empathetic listener is to rephrase what you heard. This serves two purposes: It lets the speaker know that you are listening, as well as confirm for you that you ve heard what was being said as it was intended. If you ve misinterpreted anything, the speaker has a chance to clarify what was said. It s a good foundation for coming to a solution. Are there any questions or comments about anything we ve discussed to this point? Respond to any questions or comments appropriately. Do not let this get too complex, as some of the questions might be answered during the rest of this lesson. After wrapping up any discussions presented by the students, proceed with the lesson. We have a great foundation of information about being an empathetic listener. Let s practice, so you can be confident in this new role. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 19

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE I want you to listen to a scenario. Listen closely, because afterwards, you will be working with your groups again. Pass out one clarifying question make all the difference handout to each group. Now that your group has your handout, listen to the two parts of this next scenario. After you hear both parts, your group will draft some appropriate questions that Kyle can ask Austin when they talk again. SCENARIO SCRIPT: Three facilitators or guests play the parts of the narrator, Kyla, and Tia and read the following scenario. (Read with emotion.) PART 1: Narrator: Kyla (sitting down across from Tia): Tia (not looking up from her game): Kyla was still upset about her evening, so after lunch, she decided to seek out her good friend, Tia. She found Tia in the cafeteria playing a game on her iphone. Hey, Tia, got a minute? Sure, what s up? Kyla: Tia (still not looking up): Kyla: Tia (still not looking up): Well, I had a rough evening last night. My dad s girlfriend was being her usual jerk self, and Tell me about it! My stupid brother was hogging the TV last night, and I had to watch The Bachelor on the small TV in my room. I was ticked! Uh, yea that does sound like a rough evening. Well, I better get to class. Hope tonight goes better for you. See you later. Yea, me too. The big finale is on tonight. Later. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 20

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE SCENARIO SCRIPT: Three facilitators or guests play the parts of the narrator, Kyla, and Alexa and read the following scenario. (Read with emotion.) PART 2: Narrator: Kyla (shyly): Alexa (interrupting and looking Kyla in the eye): Kyla (feeling a bit awkward): Alexa (continuing to look Kyla in the eye): Kyla: Alexa (maintaining solid eye contact): Kyla: Kyla left the cafeteria feeling alone. As she walked down the hall, she approached a fellow tennis teammate, Alexa. Kyla looked at Alexa and was about to say hi, expecting Alexa to respond with a hurried, polite response. Instead, Alexa stopped, looked Kyla in the eye, and asked her how she was doing. Kyla stopped, and studied Alexa, not knowing how to respond. Seeing the sincerity in Alexa s eyes and her grounded stance, Kyla decided to test Alexa s willingness to listen. Hey, Al Whoa. What s up? You look like something is wrong? You sure you really want to know? I asked, didn t I. Something going on? Actually, yeah. I m tired of my dad s girlfriend causing trouble with my dad and me. Sounds like you are really frustrated. I wonder if you are going through what I experienced a few years ago. Wanna talk before practice tonight? If you want to vent, I m listening. Thanks, Alexa. Sure. I ll see you in the locker room. What questions might Alexa ask Kyla to be sure she has a good picture of the situation so she can respond and help her come to a positive solution? Work together in your groups and come up with at least three good clarifying questions. If you need more room, just use the backs of your handouts. Allow the groups around 1 minute to work together. OK. Time s up. Let s see what all of you have come up with. I d like one person from your group to write your group s three questions on the whiteboard. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 21

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE Allow the group member to write the three questions on the white board. Repeat this procedure for each of the remaining groups. However, have them only write down questions that are not already written by one of the previous groups. When all groups have documented their questions on the whiteboard, bring them together and take a vote. Now that we have a good group of possible questions on the board, I want you to review them and pick just one to vote as the most important. I know there are several that are good, but concentrate now on the one you think should be considered most important. Go through the questions on the whiteboard one at a time, taking a vote by show of hands. Write the number of votes each question receives. After the voting is completed, write #1 next to the question receiving the most votes. Continue to note #2 and #3 next to the second and third questions receiving the next most votes. Let s concentrate on these top three questions. Tell me why you think these are good questions for Austin to ask Kyle when they talk. Be sure you tell us how they will help Austin in his conversation with Kyle. Let the students offer suggestions. If the discussion is strained, offer guidance. Remember, asking good questions to help you understand why a friend is upset helps you comfort that person the way they need to be comforted. Listen and ask questions before you try to offer a solution. Offering a solution to something that isn t really the issue will add frustration for the friend you are trying to help. Questions will clarify and verify the information you are receiving. Also, the more you practice asking good questions, the better you will be at asking them. It s also better to use open-ended questions, as it gives the hurting person a chance to talk and explain. Let s look at the next tip. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 22

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE TIP THREE: Don t take my friendship and what I do for you for granted. Let me know that you are grateful I m your friend and that I do caring things for you. We are going to move into Tip Three very quickly. Take a look at this tip. Hang the TIP THREE definition document on front board. That s right. Don t take my friendship for granted. No one likes to feel unappreciated. Listen to this scenario. Afterwards, you ll be asked to participate, so pay attention to the message here. SCENARIO SCRIPT: Three facilitators or guests play the parts of the narrator, Erik, and Jesse and read the following scenario. (Read with emotion.) PART 1: Narrator: Erik: Narrator: Erik: Jesse sat in the cafeteria with his usual posse surrounding him. He didn t engage much with anyone but presented himself as a oneman exhibit. He glanced up from his phone just long enough to make sure he maintained an adoring audience. A new student at school, Erik, sat down in an empty seat at his table. Everyone at the table greeted Erik and asked him questions to get to know him. Erik noticed Jesse wasn t engaging. Hi. What s your name? Jesse doesn t look up just grunts. Hey there. You look pretty engrossed in that phone. I m Erik. What s your name? Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 23

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE Jesse: Erik: Jesse: Listen, you just stumbled across the popular table, and you needed to keep on my good side in order to stay here. All those losers out there would love to trade places with you. Oh, good to know. Well, I need to check my schedule at the office before next class. Maybe I ll see some of you in my afternoon classes. Yeah, we ll see. SCENARIO SCRIPT: Three facilitators or guests play the parts of the narrator, Erik, and Chase and read the following scenario. (Read with emotion.) PART 2: Narrator: Erik: Chase: Erik: Chase: Erik: Narrator: Chase: Erik: Chase: The next day in the cafeteria, Erik chose another table of students where he saw an empty seat. Hi! Mind if I join you? Not at all. I m Chase. You new here? Yes second day. This is Tom, Jake, and Ben. We are all on the track team. Season start in a few weeks. How about you? Were you in any sports at your old school? I ran some in middle school but didn t go out for the high school team. Maybe I ll try it out again. The conversation develops from there, and all the boys participated and got to know each other better. Then the bell rang. Better get going. Mr. Hepp hates it when we are late. No detentions for me with track starting up! Gotcha! Thanks for letting me join you guys. No problem! Always good to meet another runner. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 24

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE One way of letting someone know you appreciate their friendship was shown in this scenario you just heard. Make people feel welcome when they are with you, as well as include them in your conversation. Asking open-ended questions allows them to feel like you are interested in them and gives them a chance to converse. I d like you to work in your teams again. This time, I want you to come up with other ways you can show an old or new friend that you appreciate them and are not going to take their friendship for granted. You will receive a handout. Work together and write down some good ideas that have worked for you in the past or you might think will work for you in the future. Pass out one i appreciate you handout to each group. Allow groups to work for about 1 minute. Now that you ve had time to work together, I d like each group to share some of their thoughts. I know that together you have thought of some good methods for making your friends feel appreciated. I d like one person from each group to share your top one or two ideas with the class. Write the suggestions on the whiteboard as each group shares. As you can see, these suggestions are quite easy to utilize if you keep them in mind when interacting with others. It takes little effort on your part to make others feel appreciated and dismiss feelings of being taken for granted. In fact, for one student in Minnesota, all it took to show a caring attitude towards others was a door. Let s watch. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 25

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY ONE Show the following video to the entire class (6:04 minutes): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pihtukc3gjg While Josh simply opened doors for his fellow schoolmates, what was the benefit for him? Allow students to verbally share their thoughts. Respond appropriately. Allow sharing for 1-2 minutes. That s right! Josh was no longer invisible, and he became prom king. He found a simple way to care for others, and in the process, they became more caring. He also moved beyond a very hurtful process of losing his dad, and instead of being totally withdrawn, extended himself to be a motivational speaker. Josh is a perfect example of everything we ve talked about today. Today, you have learned three ways to care for others. The next time we meet, we will learn about a few more caring techniques, as well as keeping it simple. Are there any questions about today s tips? Consider questions and answer/discuss appropriately. Refer to the tip sheets displayed on the board for clarification if needed. Between now and the next time we meet, review in your mind the three tips for caring: Ask how I m doing and express empathy, listen when I m upset and ask appropriate questions, and don t take my friendship for granted. In fact, practice these tips immediately while they are fresh in your mind. Remember, they get easier to do the more you practice using them. DAY ONE LESSON ENDS HERE Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 26

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO If the tip and skill display sheets from Day One (Tips 1-3 and 4 skills for Tip 2) have been removed from the front board, rehang them prior to class. These will be needed for the review prior to beginning Day Two. Welcome to Day Two of How Remarkable People Show They Care and Keep It Simple. On Day One, we worked through an opening exercise, followed by sessions to help you understand why it is important to be a caring person and how to show others you care, as well as keep your approach to situations and others simple. Reintroduce yourself and the other student facilitator(s). Before we proceed, let s do a quick review of the concepts we covered on Day One. Here are the tips and skills we covered. These should look familiar to you. Refer to the display sheets that were hung on day one. Read them, and interject appropriate comments as needed. Let s continue with the Caring tips. Today we will start with Tip Four. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 27

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO TIP FOUR: Let me vent and explain my feelings and be willing to apologize if I feel you ve offended me or hurt me, even if what you said/did wasn t intentional. Let me know that my hurts matter, and if you ve hurt me, even if unintentionally, apologize. Hang the TIP FOUR definition document on front board. Have you ever been frustrated because someone just wasn t letting you express your feelings? This tip reminds us that when someone is upset, they really want to be heard. They want someone to apologize to them. They will feel better if they feel they are being heard and someone is sorry for their feelings. Listen to the two parts of this scenario. I think it will help you understand the point of this tip. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 28

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO SCENARIO SCRIPT: Four facilitators or guests play the parts of the narrator, Karish, Ashton, and Ms. Clay and read the following scenario. (Read with emotion.) PART 1: Narrator: Ashton (with excitement): Karish (awkward and holding back confused emotions): Ashton: Karish: Narrator: Karish (with nervous anger in his voice): Karish felt a rush of excitement as he slipped his application for the school newspaper photographer under Ms. Clay s door. He has been waiting for this opportunity for 2 years, and his chance is finally here. No one could have anticipated that the current photographer s parents would get transferred to a different state leaving this opening! It was perfect timing. Now, all he had to do is wait for Ms. Clay, the staff sponsor, and Tabitha, the student editor, to call him in for the interview. He felt certain showing them his portfolio at the interview would get him the job. He wanted to someday have a career as a photo journalist, and this would be the first real step to that end. As he walked away from the dark, locked room, a thought flew through his mind wondering if leaving the application under the door was safe. But he was excited, wanted to be the first application to be received, and wanted them to know how serious he was. Besides, he was just being paranoid. What could really go wrong? When Ms. Clay entered her classroom in the morning, surly she couldn t help step on it and pick it up. A few days later Karish, did you hear?! I was just offered the newspaper photographer job! I can t believe it! You must not have applied, or I know you would have beat me out. Maybe I can come to you for some pointers; I m a little nervous about the sports pics. Well, I did apply and really wanted the job. Honestly, I m really disappointed. I can understand why you are so excited. Sorry, I just can t get over being bummed. Man, that s weird. If you applied, why didn t you get the job? You must really be bummed. I m sorry; I just assumed Hey, good luck. I gotta run. As Karish walked away, he was filled with conflicting emotions. What should he do? He didn t want to disappoint Ashton, but he knew that job should have been his. His anger, hurt, and confusion drove him to seek out Ms. Clay. He found her in her classroom. Ms. Clay, what happened? You know I wanted that job, and you know I m the most qualified! Why did you and Tabitha pick Ashton over me? I m so disappointed and confused. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 29

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO Ms. Clay: Karish: Ms. Clay: Karish (visibly frustrated): Ms. Clay: Karish: Ms. Clay: Karish: Ms. Clay: Karish, what are you talking about? We never received an application from you. We can only consider the applicants that were received before the deadline. I did apply on time. I slipped my application under your door the day of the announcement. I should have that job! I never received it, Karish. Are you sure you submitted it? Did you check your bag? I know I turned it in! I ve been waiting for this opportunity for 2 years! Can I reapply? I m sorry, Karish. That wouldn t be very fair to Ashton. How do I tell him now that he doesn t get the job? This isn t fair. I turned it in, and I should have a chance at the job! I m so frustrated! I have to go! I don t think you really get how important this was to me. Every student has dreams. How can I count yours more important than Ashton s? He even thinks I should have gotten the job. I have to go. I m just too disappointed right now to handle this. OK, Karish. See you tomorrow. SCENARIO SCRIPT: Four facilitators or guests play the parts of the narrator, Karish, Tabitha, and Ms. Clay and read the following scenario. (Read with emotion.) PART 2: Narrator: Tabitha: Karish (reluctantly): Tabitha: The next day, Ms. Clay asks Karish to come to her room. As he enters, he sees Ms. Clay and Tabitha waiting for him. Hi, Karish. I asked Ms. Clay to send a pass for you. We d like to talk to you. OK Ms. Clay told me you are upset you didn t get the photographer s job. Honestly, we didn t know you applied. Can you tell me what you think happened? Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 30

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO Karish: Tabitha: Karish: Ms. Clay: Karish: Tabitha: Karish (looking hopeful): Tabitha (looking at Ms. Clay as she nods): Narrator: Ms. Clay: Karish: I don t know. I was excited, so I filled out the application on the day the announcement came out and slipped it under Ms. Clay s door so I could be the first one to be considered. I was sure I d get an interview, and the next thing I know, Ashton has the job. I m so disappointed. I know I m more qualified than Ashton and really wanted this chance to work on the paper. I can see that you are disappointed. Why did you want the job so much? I want a career someday in photo journalism. This was my chance to get some experience. I can t picture myself doing anything else. I know I d be a good and wanted the chance to prove it to myself and the newspaper team. Karish, Tabitha and I have been talking. I was concerned to hear you were so disappointed and hurt. I can hear your passion for photo journalism and can understand your confusion. Please, know that Tabitha, I, and the newspaper team didn t knowingly leave you out of the interview process. We truly didn t know you were interested. We aren t sure what happened to your app, but we are sorry it got misplaced. Thanks But I asked Ms. Clay if we could extend an interview to you so you wouldn t have to suffer for someone else s error. How about bringing your portfolio in tomorrow, and we ll have a look at it? Wow, thanks for hearing me! I have it with me now! Do you have time? Sure! Let s take a look! The three of them look over the portfolio together, and Karish has a chance to explain some of his photos. It is apparent to Tabitha and Ms. Clay that Karish doesn t only have passion for photojournalism, he is truly talented. I m thinking co-photographers might just work out fine for us. You ve got an amazing eye and a talent for capturing a story in one shot. Do you think you can work with Ashton? You bet! Ashton s a great guy. I think we d make a great team! Thanks so much for listening and being willing to work with me on this. When do I report for duty?! Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 31

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO As you just witnessed, a listening ear and an apology go a long way. Karish s anger was diffused by the apology, but his hurt remained. However, the three of them were able to come to a positive solution that was fair for everyone. As soon as Karish got alone after talking to Tabitha and Ms. Clay, he got on his phone. What do you think his text to Ashton said? On the handout that is coming to you, fill out both sides. One side is what Karish would text having gotten the job, and the other side is what he would text had Ms. Clay and Tabitha not heard him nor been willing to work with him for a positive solution. Each of you will get your own paper, but feel free to work with a friend if you d like. Pass out one smile i m on the job!/i m not on the job! handout to each student. NOTE: This handout is two-sided. I know all of you text pretty quickly, so you are only getting about 60 seconds to come up with two text messages. Go! Give the students 1 minute to complete both sides of the handout. Watch to be sure all are engaged and to be sure everyone has at least one text written before proceeding. OK. Time s up. I d like a few of you to share your text messages with the class. Let s listen to the positive ones first, and then we will listen to some of the i m not on the job! ones. Listen to a few of each of the solutions and respond appropriately. There are no wrong answers; however, feel free to supplement and read the example answers given on the Answer Key handouts. Be sure to cover the difference in how Karish may have felt had Ms. Clay and Tabitha not extended a caring attitude towards him. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 32

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO I think you can easily see how important the listening skills we talked about last session are to allowing someone to vent. You also need to listen carefully to discern if you should apologize. You ll need those listening skills for the next tip, too. Let s move on to Tip Five. TIP 5: In challenging situations, remain positive; avoid blaming others, and own the situation. Avoid telling me what won t work or what you can t do, and avoid blaming others. Hang the TIP FIVE definition document on front board. Tip Five concentrates on being positive and not blaming others. Accept your part in causing a negative situation. An easy way to do this is to refrain from immediately stating what won t work or what you can t do. To make it easier for you to see this in action, each group will read through a scenario. After reading the scenario, each group will write a newspaper article together about the situation and solution. Remember, a good newspaper article contains the five Ws who, what, where, when, and why and sometimes how. As soon as your group receives the handouts, you can begin. Start assigning people to be characters to read through the scenario and a scribe to document discussions and write the newspaper article. You will have around 5 minutes to complete this, so don t waste any time. Jump right in. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 33

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO Pass out one scenario and one extra! extra! read all about it! handout to each group. NOTE: The extra! read all about it! handout is two-sided. SCENARIO SCRIPT: Each group will need six students (double up on parts if needed.) to play the parts of Narrator, Sarah, Bree, Tia, Jazzy, and Coach Renee. Narrator: Sarah: Bree: Tia: Bree: Tia: It s halftime, and everyone can feel the defeat in the locker room. It s easy to join in the talk and blame everyone else for the horrible gap in the score. Most of the girls are blaming the poor referring, the bad judgment of the coaches, the other girls who aren t making their shots, the other team playing dirty, the injured players sitting the bench, etc. Jazzy has two choices to join in or speak up and engage the team in some positive solutions in hopes of turning things around in the next quarter. The coach said it best, It s simply putting the ball in the basket, Ladies. So, Jazzy decides to keep it simple and get the team to concentrate on a few things that will allow them to shoot and score! They need to own the defeat and take responsibility to turn the defeat into a win. Man, what a bust. Those refs are burying us out there! What are they thinking? The have it out for us! I know! They are killing us! We should be winning this game! It s not fair!!!! We would be winning this game if the refs were calling it fair! And, what s with missing all your shots, Bree? Me?! Are you kidding? Julie missed way more than I did! And at least I take shots! You won t even try to make a shot! Maybe I could if you would pass the ball to me! In fact, no one passes to me! I m tired of being ignored out there! Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 34

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO Sarah: Tia: Jazzy (reluctantly after listening to all her teammates place blame on everyone else): Coach Renee (walks in just in time to hear Jazzy): Narrator: No one passes to you because you won t take a shot. We need the points. Only one way to get points shoot! Wrong, Sarah! The only way to make points is to get the ball in the basket! Guys. What are we doing here? We aren t acting like a team in here, and we aren t acting like a team out there. We can blame everyone else, but Tia s right. The only way we can win this game is to keep it simple. We have to accept blame for the score out there, act like a team and run our plays, and get that ball to the hoop. We can turn this game around! Who is with me?! Jazzy, I like your spirit. I don t think I could have said it better. Hands in, girls. Everyone now, Go, Lady Bears! Win, Lady Bears! Now let s get out there and take this game! It s simple! Just play to win! Keep your eyes on that basket, Ladies! The girls stormed the court with a new determination. They dominated the court, blocked opposing shots, and scored numerous points. Defeat was left in the locker room, and they took the win by 13 points! Give the students 5 minutes to complete both sides of the handout. Watch to be sure all are engaged and to be sure everyone has at least some of the article written before proceeding. Preferably, all groups will have completed their articles. OK. We ll go around the room and have a spokesperson from each group read the article for the rest of the class. Please, listen to each group s written article and see how it differs from your group s article. Also, listen for their solution. Have each group read their article, and respond appropriately. Be sure each group as include the five Ws (and how if needed). Be sure each group has included the solution (Jazzy s positive attitude that rallied the girls to a victory). I think we all have a good idea of why this scenario is a good example of Tip Five. Jazzy remained positive, didn t try to blame others for the situation they were in, and offered a positive solution. Remember, they could have not won the game. That was just icing on the cake. But, going out and changing the emphasis on their playing rather than putting blame on everyone else was their best shot at winning. This can be transferred into all kinds of situations. Look for ways you can influence what is happening. Remaining positive is always a good idea and promotes the best possible solution! Let s look at the next tip. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 35

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO TIP 6: Anticipate my needs and help me find a simple solution. Be proactive to help me find a simple solution, so the task won t have to be redone. Hang the TIP SIX definition document on front board. Tip Six concentrates on being aware of all aspects of a situation in order to anticipate other s needs. In doing this, you will avoid having to redo a task or misplacing service by doing something not really needed. Have you ever done something to be nice but not been appreciated for your efforts? It might be you misplaced your service by doing something that really didn t need to be done, or perhaps you didn t do it in a way that was truly beneficial to the person you were trying to help. Well, this is what happened to Coach Riley. Coach Riley is asking for some of the girls on the basketball team to help him. In your groups, you will read the first half of the next scenario. Then on the back of the scenario handout, finish the scenario in a way that shows the girls get the concept of doing something right the first time and that redoing a task is a waste of everyone s time. Pass out one scenario and one extra! extra! read all about it! handout to each group. NOTE: The extra! read all about it! handout is two-sided. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 36

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO NOTE: The scenario below is identical to the scenario on the student handout. The last rows that are highlighted in gray are the suggested solution shown on the Answer Key/Example. It is shown here as a convenience for the facilitators. SCENARIO SCRIPT: Each group will need six students (double up on parts if needed) to play the parts of Narrator, Coach Riley, Cara, Brittney, Joanne, Dani, and the narrator. Coach Riley (showing the equipment closet to the volunteers): Cara (as the coach is walking away): Brittney: Narrator: Joanne: Dani: Narrator: Coach Riley (returning to the equipment closet): Joanne: Coach Riley: Dani (embarrassed): Narrator: I m so glad you girls are willing to help me out today. I have a lot of office work to do, so I m going to need to trust you to clean up this equipment room for me. This floor needs to be totally cleared of equipment. I guess people don t get it that the shelves are here for a reason! Well, good luck! I ll check on you as soon as I can get a break. OK, girls. You heard the coach! He wants us to clear the floor. Let s get busy. Maybe if we finish early, we can shoot some baskets before our rides come to get us. Why don t we split the area into four areas, and we can each clear up our area. That way, we won t run into each other. The girls worked on their areas, putting all the equipment on the shelves nearest to them. After about 10 minutes I m almost finished! How are you guys doing? Looks like Brittney and Cara are finishing up. I m just putting my last softball on my shelf. Just as Dani is finishing up, Coach peeked into the room. Hey, I can see the floor. Oh um I hate to say this, but why is all the equipment mixed on the shelves? You said to clear the floor, and we did! But, girls, I thought you d understand that the equipment needed to be sorted by sport and put on the shelves in an organized, orderly way. Did you not notice the labels on all the shelves? Well, I have to continue calling bus companies so we can all get to our regional and sectional games. Can I count on you to correct this? Yes, Coach! So sorry! We ll dig in right away! As Coach returned to his office Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 37

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO Brittney (as the coach walked away): Cara: Joanne: Dani: Narrator: Coach Riley (entering the room): Let s get cracking, girls! We ll need to almost totally empty the shelves so we can restock them. Wow! Looks like we created more of a mess. OK, let s make this as simple as possible. How about we take our corners again and take all the softball stuff and place it by Dani. It looks like she is in the softball corner. Then we can tackle the volleyball, baseball, and soccer stuff. What were we thinking? That was way too easy. We should have known Coach wanted us to organize this mess instead of just clear the floor. He must think we are total losers! I know! Let s take it a step further and make new labels. These look like they have been here since before we were born! Let s surprise Coach! He deserves a little surprise! 30 minutes later I thought I better check on you. I thought you d be finished before now. Oh wow! This room looks great! Are these new labels?! I m proud of all of you. You saw a problem and took the initiative to make it better. Thanks, Ladies; good work! Who s up for shooting some hoops until your rides come? Let s hit the court! Give the students 3 minutes to complete the scenario. Watch to be sure all are engaged and to be sure everyone has a solution written before proceeding. I d like each group to tell us their solution. You can either read what you ve written or just tell us. Please, listen to each group s solution and see how it differs from your group s solution. Have each share their scenario solutions with the class, and respond appropriately. Be sure they have a solution that satisfies the coach s expectations of the completed task. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 38

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO There really are no right or wrong answers. You came up with some good solutions. Let me tell you one more solution. Read the gray rows from the scenario ending. In this solution, the girls not only did the job the right way, they went a step further. They anticipated a future need by updating the old labels while they straightened the equipment. The coach appreciated the work they did. It showed in a very simple way that they cared about him. Remember that the way you do a job or task shows others how much you care about them. It also is an efficient way to go about a task and simplifies the task by getting it done correctly the first time. There s one more important thing we need to talk about today. We ve covered the six tips of caring and simple. This is such an important step, that we are calling it Plus One. PLUS ONE: Know when to involve a trusted adult. When it s no longer simple or I m in danger, be brave enough to get an adult involved. Hang the PLUS ONE definition document on front board. So, Plus One is your reminder that in caring for others, sometimes it becomes very complex and difficult. This is the most important step of all, because it involves severe situations that are out of your scope as a young person. The first thing we need to establish is what a trusted adult looks like. Each group will receive a handout. Do some very quick brainstorming and come up with a list of trusted adults. Be as thorough as possible. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 39

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO Pass out one a trusted adult can be handout to each group. Allow groups 1 minute to generate a list of trusted adults on their handouts. After 1 minute, ask volunteers from each group to share their list items. Be sure to respond appropriately and fill in from the answer key suggested list items. Our list of trusted adults is a good one. Trusted adults are adults who show care for you and others, are good listeners, and offer wise advice. They will be able to take appropriate action in resolving a situation you find too complex to handle. So, what are some situations that will require the involvement of a trusted adult? Work with your groups one last time to come up with some situations that would require the involvement of an adult. Pass out one it s not simple help handout to each group. Allow groups 1 minute to generate a list of situations that require the involvement of trusted adults on their handouts. After 1 minute, gain the attention of all the students. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 40

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO As a group reread your list to be sure you remember what situations you ve included. I d like every group to pass their handout to the group to their right. You will continue to do this until you have your own handout back again. While you have another group s handout, read it and place a check mark next to situations that are the same as one you included on your handout. Allow groups enough time to review every other group s handouts. When the handouts have circulated through all the groups, gain the attention of the students. Now that you have your own handouts back again, I need a volunteer from each group to share the situation on your handouts with the most checks next to it. Allow each group to share. Respond appropriately. Now I m going to read a list of situations. If your team included each particular situation on your handout, raise your hand. Read the list from the Answer Key/Examples document. Allow time for students to raise their hands for each item. You ve all heard a lot of situations that require adult involvement. The most caring person will get help for others despite the consequences. If someone has asked you to keep some information secret, but it falls into one of the situations we just mentioned, encourage that person to go to a trusted adult. Let them know that if they don t, you will. You need to care about their wellbeing and get help dealing with the situation more than trying to keep them from being mad at you. Weigh the real concrete possible outcomes of your silence. Is it really worth it? How will you feel if you keep silent and someone gets hurt? The purpose of this last Plus One tip is to make you aware of your limitations. You may be well-meaning, but there are some situations that even much older people cannot handle without involving a professional. To wrap up today s session and this lesson, I want you to do one more thing. Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 41

DETAILED LESSON GUIDE: DAY TWO CLOSING: The best thing you can carry away today is a strategy to improve on how to be caring and a determination to keep situations as simple as possible. Each of you will get one last final handout. The first part of the handout asks who you consider a caring role model. Remember, this is a very individual choice. This person can be any age, can be someone you know personally or have only heard of, or can be in your family, your church, your neighborhood, your school. Just take a minute to think or write down the first person who pops into your head. Sometimes our first thoughts are our best and most valid thoughts. I want you to work alone. The handout will be self-explanatory. You may get started as soon as you receive a handout. Pass out one my caring role model is handout to each group. Allow time for students to work alone. Monitor progress so you can proceed as quickly as possible. Thank you for working so diligently. Is there anyone who would like to share your responses you wrote on your handout? As time allows, let some students share as much as they feel comfortable sharing. Respond appropriately. What amazing thoughts and ideas all of you have had over the two days of this lesson. I really like what you all shared just now. You ve highlighted good tips for us to remember as we leave. Thank you for participating. Go out there and show others how much you care! Copyright, State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company, 2014 42