HOW TO MANAGE EFFECTIVELY IN THE DIGITAL AGE In today s digital world, when a staff meeting is called it most likely includes a conference bridge, online meeting, or video chat. Organizations and their teams are more spread out than ever before. Without the face to face interactions it can be more challenging for managers to create alignment, maintain accountability, and reach objectives. Dale Carnegie Training s Leadership Guide will give you the tools to build relationships that create trust, ensure alignment, and build engagement so that when it is time to perform your team is ready to execute and succeed.
HOW TO MERIT & MAINTAIN OTHERS TRUST AVOID ARGUMENT Set yourself apart by avoiding the arguments that most people would jump into with both feet. Be willing to question your motives and methods. Is what you are about to do going to gain you favorable or unfavorable attention? Can you gain respect as well? Successful negotiators know that few arguments change people s minds. Learn to value interdependence more than independence and being right. Observe the arguments of others to see where there are possibilities for mutual insights and individual personal growth. What can you do to encourage them to use grace and goodwill? Social media can be a powerful tool to escalate an argument or to promote mutual understanding. Look for examples when people could have taken the high road, but didn t. NEVER SAY, YOU RE WRONG Recognize that opposing parties have legitimate concerns and you will strengthen your ability to negotiate a successful outcome. When faced with opposition, try not to make differences of opinion sound bigger than they really are. Build upon similarities and mutual concerns by keeping an open mind. Always default to diplomacy. Use a humble approach that acknowledges the possibility that you might be wrong, not the other person. This creates the possibility for collaboration. Willingly value the opportunity to collaborate over personal victory. Ask yourself, what greater good might we create together if neither of us worries about who is right? Examine your recent online communications. Are there times when receivers of your communications may have interpreted your tone to mean, You are wrong? Avoid presenting an argument online. Conduct these communications more respectively, in face-to-face conversation. ADMIT FAULTS QUICKLY AND EMPATHETICALLY Negative news spreads faster in the digital age. Get out in front of your mistakes right away. Let people know that you genuinely care about the affect your actions have on others. Social media can help us broadcast apologies quickly. Address rather than bury mistakes. You are human. Gain forgiveness and the generosity of others so that you can move forward. Gain perspective by examining the effects that hiding from mistakes has cost some celebrities and companies. What lessons can you learn from these examples?
HOW TO MERIT & MAINTAIN OTHERS TRUST BEGIN IN A FRIENDLY WAY Online communications should immediately communicate to the receiver, You are worth my time. How can you ensure this happens with each message you deliver? Choose to begin in a civil tone rather than an emotional when there is potential for conflict. Regardless of your feelings, take a moment to create a bond. Ask about the other person. Don t make the mistake of holding the recipient accountable for your message. It is your action and approach that will determine your ability to influence. Stay away from abbreviated forms of communication (texts, chats) that limit the space and tone needed to build friendly rapport. Use methods that allow you to fully express emotions necessary to nurture relationships. ACCESS AFFINITY Digital media allows us to look for commonality and connection points before we ever say, hello. Think about possible connection points you have with others and reach out regularly. Get people to say yes to your point of view by establishing affinity through social networks. The more yeses you gain, the more likely you will be in getting others to accept your ideas. Remind yourself to always see the situation from the other s point of view so that you can determine the value each of you gains by maintaining the relationship. Create affinity with individuals to begin a dialogue. Create affinity with groups to influence and expand a community. SURRENDER THE CREDIT Show sincere gratitude to build your power to influence. Claim all the credit for an accomplishment and your influence will likely diminish. Find ways to put the betterment of others first. When you do this others will likely reciprocate with a longer term relationship. When celebrating successes, defer the accolades. Instead highlight partnership and progress. Don t look for favors from others. Do something genuine and heart-felt for them. Observe the effect on others when you surrender the credit for your role in an achievement.
HOW TO MERIT & MAINTAIN OTHERS TRUST ENGAGE WITH EMPATHY Adopt a nobody is perfect attitude. Remember when communicating with others to ask yourself, How would I feel and react if I were in his / her shoes? Recall a particularly difficult situation, current or in the past. Can you consider the other person s ideas and feelings as important as your own? Avoid making assumptions about others by taking time to research their current circumstances. Every second you spend gaining understanding is an investment in the relationship. Empathy is not a networking tactic. Learn to be gracious and put others first especially during adversity if you want to influence people. APPEAL TO NOBLER MOTIVES Doing business in the digital age is based on doing the business of humanity well. Identify actions you, colleagues and companies could take to be more socially or globally responsible. Tap into the power of social media to conduct the business of humanity. What could you do to rally people in the virtual world to come together and do great work for a common cause? When faced with difficult choices, encourage people to do the right thing and be part of something bigger than themselves. Identify company values have a clear link to the idealism most individuals aspire to. Point out these higher motives to inspire positive action and cooperation. SHARE YOUR JOURNEY Regularly show ordinary people how they connect to a larger story to make them feel extraordinary. Eagerly share your mission and your listeners can become your strongest advocates. Your power to influence plays out through them. Have the courage tell a personal story. There may be more value in the help it provides to you and to others than the value you receive in keeping it private. Eliminate doubts about the relevance of your stories to others by always remembering, Life is not about me it is about us! Use all tools that are available to you to make your ideas pop. When you share your stories, others will too and together you create a larger story and a larger community. THROW DOWN A CHALLENGE Great lessons come from competitions. While connection is necessary to keep us thriving, competition is necessary to keep us striving. What lessons have you learned from competition? Encourage the best from yourself and others by seeking out challenges and idea collisions. Look around your sphere of influence for an area that could lead to a competition that would have greater importance than just reaching the finish line. Throw down that challenge! What challenge could you make to a social network that would spark positive change and potentially builds lasting friendships through the experience?
HOW TO LEAD CHANGE WITHOUT RESISTANCE OR RESENTMENT BEGIN ON A POSITIVE NOTE Start conversations with honest and genuine appreciation; your listeners will be less defensive and more open to your ideas. Avoid presenting people with the harsh realities first. The negative aspects of the message may block out the positive and your listeners may only hear problems or criticism. Recognize that our perceptions are not always in line with truth. Take time to test your underlying assumptions about problem situations. Make sure the positive comments you deliver are authentic and not just an opener for later criticism. Acknowledge the value that the other person brings to the situation. Resist the urge to promote drama in your organization. Don t however water down a negative message, reporting it inaccurately, or ignore it completely. Refrain from using the word but after any positive message to build credibility with your listeners. ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR BAGGAGE Admit to mistakes. It creates an opportunity for you as a leader. It shows you are human and makes it easier for other people to relate to, and respect you, and be open to your advice. Direct the other person s attention away from his or her own mistakes on to yours to avoid raising his or her defenses immediately. CALL OUT MISTAKES QUIETLY Rather than punish wrong behaviors, use the situation to build self-confidence and a deeper connection. Avoid criticism that can cause defenses to go up leading to more conflict. Treat mistakes as isolated, redeemable instances rather than fatal flaws. Talk with people privately about their mistakes and always keep in mind, you goal is to return them to a place of confidence and strength.
HOW TO LEAD CHANGE WITHOUT RESISTANCE OR RESENTMENT ASK QUESTIONS INSTEAD OF GIVING DIRECT ORDERS Interview artfully and listen to the responses of people closest to any situation. It will improve your ability motivate others. They will likely do what is expected without you telling them. Ask questions to surface new perspectives. If you rely only on your answers you may miss an opportunity to achieve a greater result through engaging others. Ask individuals for their self-appraisals before giving your feedback on their performance. Use this as the basis for setting goals and identifying areas of improvement. Be willing to honestly assess your own performance. How willing are you to respond to a direct order? Would you perform differently if you were asked, rather than told? Use digital messages to send questions to people in advance. This allows everyone to prepare for face-to-face conversation and be more involved in the outcome. MITIGATE FAULT Take the time to let the other person save face. Even if he or she is wrong we can do nothing to change the behavior. Help others turn their failures around by making it safe for people to learn from their mistakes. Tap into their creative and innovative ideas for improvement. Everyone has a fear of failure. Ask yourself how you and your team can share lessons learned in order to become more resilient in the face of future problems. Acknowledge failures and encourage discussion of problems and risks openly. This builds understanding and a level of trust. A primary difference between ordinary and extraordinary people is how they perceive and respond to failure. How can you as a leader influence which camp a person falls into? Digital media can make faults and missteps more public. Adopt a strict discipline to only use phone and face-toface meetings for criticism. Save your written communications for praise. MAGNIFY IMPROVEMENT Send a clear message that others have performed well and are important to the success of the organization by delivering specific praise for a job well done. Use digital messages to help you praise people publically and immediately. There is no excuse for delay until the next face-to-face meeting. Give praise when people achieve good results. Give encouragement all the time, even when things go poorly. Remember to continually look for the strengths and potential in people. Look back over the past month and evaluate your performance on delivering praise and encouragement. What things would you change? What messages would you deliver? Tell someone that you have total faith in his/her ability to accomplish a goal, encourage him/her along the way and he/she will prove you right and excel.
HOW TO LEAD CHANGE WITHOUT RESISTANCE OR RESENTMENT GIVE OTHERS A FINE REPUTATION TO LIVE UP TO Lead individuals to achieve things they don t believe possible by helping them to define success. Set expectations high and show unwavering support and encouragement to people as they make those expectations a reality. Change a person s behavior by changing the level of respect he or she receives. Act as though the behavior you want to influence is already the person s strength. STAY CONNECTED ON COMMON GROUND Help people to feel glad to do what is being asked. Do this by connecting to common goals. Identify what would make the situation a win-win for everyone. To find the one degree that connects us rather than separates us, use social media to find common interests, experiences and goals. Write to the people you want to learn more about. Your common interests and well framed questions will often bridge the gap in your acquaintance. Connect with people you don t know who have reached out to learn more about you and your success. Social media makes transparency, outreach and openness easier and more important than ever. Use these tools to seek answers and act on the information you receive rather than ignore it. Remind yourself to ask people about their desires and dreams. These give you keen insights into what motivates them. Win friends and influence people by creating interdependence and maintaining connections by keeping the common ground in sight. For more information, please visit us at www.dalecarnegie.com Copyright 2012 Dale Carnegie & Associates, Inc. All rights reserved. Leadership_032112GB