UNLEASHED CONSULTING. The 10 Commandments For Making Any Meeting Powerful and Productive. (aka The Greatest Ground Rules Ever!)

Transcription

1 UNLEASHED CONSULTING Consulting Training Coaching The 10 Commandments For Making Any Meeting Powerful and Productive (aka The Greatest Ground Rules Ever!) Danny Ceballos, MBA, MA Unleashed Consulting

2 Introduction First of all, these really are NOT Commandments they are, however, tried-and-true suggested shared group agreements that are powerful to shape any time people gather together so that candid honest communication can happen. These commandments create the foundation for safe respectful discourse in ANY meeting. Why Use the 10 Commandments? Meetings of any size, whether with two participants or 2,000, often go nowhere because participants are not: Focused Respectful of each other Enjoying themselves Feeling like the time is being used well As a meeting leader, you can help with this by establishing clear shared agreements (also know as ground-rules) at the beginning of the meeting. I ve put together what I think are the top 10 commandments of any meeting, but of course there are many more. Click here to see those others that I ve collected and let me know what you d like me to add to the list. If you re not establishing shared agreements before any substantive meeting that you re running, you re making a huge mistake you re asking participants to have a meeting experience that is Time wasting Only benefiting the extroverts Disrespectful Not productive Directions Look over the following 10 Commandments, pick the ones that really strike a chord with you (likely all of them!) and introduce them at your next meeting. I ve given you a script for each of the commandments, so that if you like, you can explain the commandment using that language. Of course, you may have a different way of explaining any of them just use whatever language is comfortable for you. After you ve used these a few times, you ll see how powerful they can be for setting the tone, and building the trust, that s critical for any meeting. And after a few times, you ll be able to explain the commandments based on your own experience with them. Make sure to get a collective head-nod from everyone before you start your meeting! It s important that everyone agrees with them, and will hold each other accountable to honoring all of them. Also ask if any of the language needs to be tweaked or edited for the group. Getting buy-in and support is super important. 2 The 10 Commandments For Making Any Meeting Powerful and Productive

3 The 10 Commandments For Making Any Meeting Powerful & Productive A.P.I. (Assume Positive Intent) Assume Positive Intent is a powerful first commandment it asks you to fully hear others and even when you disagree with them, to grant them amnesty to remind yourself that despite what you re thinking about their contribution to the discussion, that it is coming from a good place, from a well-intentioned place. We re all here for the same reason, and we all have distinct and different views of the world. A.P.I. acknowledges and honors that diversity encourages different points of view and asks all of us to support that from our deepest heartfelt places. Own Your Impact A.P.I. does not give you a hall pass, however, to say anything you d like and not take responsibility for your words. Own Your Impact asks you to be thoughtful about what you contribute to the group discussion and when you contribute, be prepared for whatever the impact might be. If you can t do that thoughtfully and responsibly, then please consider whether it s really worth sharing. Step Up, Step Back Step Up, Step Back is to support deep democracy honoring all the voices and input in the room and acknowledging that some of us are used to hearing our voices in the room A LOT and if that s the case, asks us to step back and give room to other voices. The counter to that is if you are not hearing your voice in the room in a substantive way, this commandment asks you to step up and add your voice whenever possible. It s tough to read minds, so it s important to ensure that your voice is in the conversation. 4 One Mic, One Voice (also called One Diva, One Voice!) Again in the effort to support a deeply democratic process in any meeting, this Commandment says simply that when voices overlap each other in meeting, it can be difficult to discern what is being said. We can overcome this by honoring the voice that is in the room by not shutting it down with our own. We wait patiently for the appropriate time to offer our input. The 10 Commandments For Making Any Meeting Powerful and Productive 3

4 5 Misery Is Optional We each have some personal responsibility in the experience that we have today. This agreement says that we need to take care of ourselves to maximize the effectiveness of our valuable (and costly) time together. So if you need to use technology in order to be present, you may do that. But know your own meeting saboteurs refrain from using any technology that distracts you. Generally, cell phones set to off or vibrate is a good idea, but the decision is yours. Likewise, if you need to stretch to doodle to ask for clarification on a comment to use the restroom!... you are obliged to take care of your needs so that you are fully present. 6 The Ouch Rule This is a handy efficient way of pausing the course of a meeting because you are having an emotional (and likely intellectual) reaction to something that s been said or a dynamic in the room and can t be a responsible contributor to the meeting until some acknowledgment/ process occurs that softens (or eradicates) the sting of the offensive comment/dynamic. Simply, when you are in that place of emotional overload that creates pain or confusion, you say Ouch. Saying that asks the meeting to pause, and gives you the right to ask for what you need in order to address whatever is happening. But don t forget Own Your Impact! Be prepared for whatever may come your way. 7 E.L.M.O. (i.e., Enough, Let s Move On.) Like the Ouch Rule above, ELMO gives everyone the power to direct the meeting so that it is most productive for EVERYONE. Anyone can invoke ELMO at any time and it asks for a facilitated close to the current topic/discussion. Often times, ELMO can be the voice of reason in a passionate discourse. Of course, simply saying ELMO doesn t guarantee that the topic has run its needed course, but it asks the meeting participants whether in fact, the consensus is to move on. 8 Adapt, Not Adopt With any great idea there is plenty of wiggle room. Successful innovation demands that we are nimble that we are open to new ideas and suggestions. It does not, however, mean that you adopt all good ideas as absolutes instead it asks you to thoughtfully consider HOW you can include the essential best part(s) of what is proposed. It asks you to put ego aside, and humbly acknowledge that there may be gold in the imperfect ideas that come up in any meeting. Your job is to determine the merit and best fit for those ideas, specific to your situation 4 The 10 Commandments For Making Any Meeting Powerful and Productive

5 9 The Easy Way Out Usually Leads Back In. Stay Curious. Be Fascinated This agreement honors that there is a community in this room filled with opportunities, insights, and roadblocks BUT that the most complex conversations that need to happen are not easy ones to have. The best way to approach those tough community conversations is for each of us to individually remind ourselves to stay vigilantly curious when you hear something that you don t understand or disagree with simply ask yourself I wonder what s behind that? Instead of rushing to judgment, pause for a moment and think, Well, isn t that fascinating! 10 Everyone Gets To Be Partially Right. The Wisdom Is In The Room. This is really a 2-for-1 agreement. First, is the critical acknowledgment that EVERYONE here owns a part of the truth and NOBODY gets to be wrong. It is only in coming together in spirited thoughtful discussion where everyone brings their best and authentic selves to the party that our real collective knowledge, experience, and insight is tapped. The second piece of this agreement says that when we come together respectfully with our egos firmly planted in the back seat then the wisdom of the system shows itself. We are smarter together than we are individually. Final Thoughts Again, these commandments are really suggested shared agreements for you to bring to your meetings and workplace. They come from a growing list that you can find here and that I hope you ll add to (just send me an with your suggestion). These 10 commandments, however, are the most powerful and elegant that I ve ever worked with. I ve used them for many years with tremendous success and a few are from trusted colleagues that have experienced similar results using them. Adopted at the beginning of any meeting, these 10 Commandments invite participants to bring their best and most productive selves to the room and isn t that what you want as an effective manager and best boss?! If you re ready to take the next step to becoming a Best Boss if you re ready to be a manager who Is skilled and confident at motivating and engaging others Has more time to do your job, and less time dealing with team drama Really enjoys your job (and the people you work with) Then why not schedule a complimentary 30-minute coaching session with me? Click here to book a convenient time and I ll give you a call. There s no obligation and I guarantee that you ll hang up the phone a better manager than when you start the call!! Danny Ceballos, is a leadership consultant, trainer and executive coach. He works with individuals and organizations to excel in their workplace performance, productivity, and engagement through Unleashed Consulting and his BEST BOSS BOOTCAMP. Changing the world one manager at a time The 10 Commandments For Making Any Meeting Powerful and Productive 5