I am habit. Goals of Workshop. Aristotle. 7 Habits of Highly Effective People FASRO Tim Center, Esq

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1 THE7 HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE Florida Association of School Resource Officers July 2014 Riddle I am your constant companion. I am your greatest helper or heaviest burden. I am completely at your command. I am easily managed; you must merely be firm with me. Those who are great, I have made great. Those who are failures, I have made failures. I am not a machine, Though I work with the precision of a machine, Plus the intelligence of a human being. Take me, train me, be firm with me, And I will place the world at your feet. Be easy with me and I will destroy you. I am habit. We are what we do repeatedly. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit. Aristotle Goals of Workshop Introduce the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People Focus on what matters most Become a teacher Have fun

2 Trick of the Day If you understand the framework And follow the process You get better results!!! With partner Introductions Introduce yourself name, etc. Without speaking and using gestures only tell something about yourself hobby, life event, favorite activity, etc. Announce a desired result from the training

3 Big words Well-dressed PERSONALITY Negotiator Slick Glib Patient Fair Committed Understanding Supportive CHARACTER Open Honest Persistent Flexible Loyal 7 Sharpen the Saw Habit Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood Interdependence 5 Public Think Win-Win 4 Synergize 6 Independence Put First 3Things First Private 1 2 Begin with Be Proactive the End in Mind Dependence Skill (how to) Knowledge (what to, why to) HABIT Desire (want to)

4 Production Effectiveness P/PC Balance Production Capability Basic Change Model SEE Desired Results Assets GET DO Principles Natural laws or fundamental truths Universal, timeless Produce predictable outcomes External to ourselves Operate with or without our understanding or acceptance Self-evident and enabling when understood Integrity Honesty Kindness Fairness Principles Service Contribution Balance Consideration

5 Daily Principle Emotional Bank Account Deposits Kindness & courtesy Keeping Promises Honoring Expectations Loyalty to the absent Making apologies Withdrawals Unkindness and discourtesy Breaking Promises Violating expectations Disloyalty / Duplicity Pride, conceit & arrogance Interdependence 5 6 Public 4 Independence 3 Private 1 Private 2 Be Proactive Dependence 7 Habit 1: Be Proactive Principle Individuals are responsible for their own choices and have the freedom to choose Paradigm I am responsible for my behavior and the choices I make in life

6 Proactivity vs. Reactivity Proactive Behavior Proactivity The power, freedom, and ability to choose responses according to values Reactivity Allowing moods, feelings, and circumstances to drive responses Stimulus Freedom to choose according to values Response Choose according to values one STEP at a time Stop Become self-aware examine thoughts, moods and behaviors Think Of options imagine visualize beyond present reality Evaluate Compare options to values use your conscience and exercise personal integrity Proceed Acting independent of external influences CIRCLE OF OF INFLUENCE

7 From Lou Holtz When people want me to help them with a problem at work, I ask them to do 3 things: 1. Write the problem. 2. Write 2 or 3 possible solutions. 3. Then I ask: What do you want me to do for you? Be Proactive Take initiative Work to resolve problems Maintain Self-control Accept responsibility Make a decision when a decision is needed Interdependence 5 6 Independence Private Begin with the End in Mind Dependence 1 Public Habit 2: Begin with the End in Mind Principle Mental creation preceded physical creation Paradigms I can choose my own future and create a vision for it I will create results mentally before beginning any activity

8 What is at the center? Family Money Your Mission Statement: A tool for increasing your effectiveness Self Spouse Religious Organization Enemy Possessions Work Pleasure Friend What is it? A powerful document that expresses your personal sense of purpose and meaning in life. Why create one? It acts as a governing constitution by which you evaluate decisions and choose behaviors. To act in a manner that brings out the best in myself and others, especially when it might seem justifiable to act otherwise. H

9 To be the sort of person my dog thinks I already am Whitney Noziska - Teenager... Care - Love - Fight - Rock - About the World, About Life, About People, About Myself Myself, My Family, My World, Knowledge, Learning, Life For my Beliefs, For my Passions, To Accomplish, To Do Good, To Be True to Myself, Against Apathy The Boat, Don t Let the Boat Rock Me, Be a Rock Be Remembered! I work hard to help others succeed in my community. Through love, patience and understanding, I am an important part of my family s life and they a part of mine. I love and honor Amy through my actions. Together we will create a safe, loving and nurturing home and life for Hayden to grow, learn and succeed. I am a friend who lives life fully with great humor and passion. Life is fun. Tim Center Exercise: 80 th Birthday Identify who you want to speak Write down what you would want them to say Be specific goals, observations, compliments Use these accolades and comments as the basis for your mission statement

10 Begin With the End in Mind Begin projects with a clear understanding of desired outcomes Plan ahead to reduce working in crisis mode Set clear expectations Display a sense of direction in life Habit 1: You are the programmer Interdependence 5 6 Public 4 Independence 7 Put First 3Things First Private 1 2 Begin with Be Proactive the End in Mind Dependence Habit 3: Run the program Habit 2: Write the program Habit 3: Put First Things First Principle Effectiveness requires balancing important relationships, roles, and activities Paradigms I will focus on importance instead of urgency I fulfill my mission by acting on important goals in my key roles More Effective Scheduling M T W Th F Sa Su I I

11 Yes No Saying Yes and No Traditional Scheduling M T W Th F Sa Su I I IV I IV I I IV I I The Bermuda Triangle of Time Time Management Matrix IMPORTANT I URGENT Crises Pressing problems Deadline-driven projects, meetings preparations NOT URGENT Preparation Prevention Values clarification Planning Relationship building Needed relaxation Empowerment NOT IMPORTANT Needless interruptions Unnecessary reports Unimportant meetings phone calls, mail Other people s issues I Trivia, busywork Some phone calls Time wasters Escape activities Irrelevant mail Excessive TV IV

12 What s deeply important to me The Six-Step Process 1 Connect to 6 Evaluate Mission 2 Review Roles The way I spend my time 5 Exercise Integrity 4 Organize Weekly 3 Identify Goals The Six-Step Process Put First Things First Step Connect to Mission Review Roles Identify Goals Organize Weekly Exercise Integrity Evaluate End in Mind Purpose 2 minutes Balance 2 minutes Focus 10 minutes Schedule 10 mins. Space 10,080 mins. Feedback 5 minutes Prioritize work Carry out your plan Organize multiple tasks Responds to requests in a timely manner Practices punctuality

13 Public and Private Victories Private victories precede public victories. You can t invert that process anymore than you can harvest a crop before you plant it. It s inside out. ~Stephen R. Covey Route Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood Interdependence 5 Independence 3 Public Think Win-Win 4 Synergize 7 6 Fruit Root Put First Things First Private 1 2 Begin with Be Proactive the End in Mind Dependence Habit 4: Think Win-Win Principle Effective, long-term relationships require mutual benefit Paradigms I seek the benefit of others as well as my own I get better results in my relationships by cooperating interdependently than by competing independently Abundance/Scarcity Mentality Abundance Mentality There is plenty out there for everybody Scarcity Mentality There isn t enough to go around so I better get mine first

14 Elements of Win-Win Agreements Desired Results Guidelines Resources Accountability Consequences Clarify the end in mind objectives and outcome Specify boundaries/deadlines List resources available ID how measure progress Determine results of achieving or not achieving win-win Think Win-Win Do not undermine others Interacts fairly with all people Works in the best interest of the entire organization Share credit and recognition for success Strives to find win-win situations Is not a weak position Route Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood Interdependence 5 Independence 3 Public Think Win-Win 4 Synergize 7 6 Fruit Root Put First Things First Private 1 2 Begin with Be Proactive the End in Mind Dependence Habit 5: Seek First to Understand Principles Diagnosis must precede prescription Understanding comes through listening Paradigms I assume I don t fully understand, and I need to listen If I listen first to understand, then I will be better understood

15 Use Empathic Listening When we are not sure we understand When we are not sure the other person feels understood When the interaction has a strong emotional component Empathic Listening Responses Repeat verbatim what was said Rephrase content Reflect feelings Rephrase content and reflect feelings Discern when not necessary or appropriate Listen Empathically Reflect feeling and/or content: So, you feel about. Seek First to Understand Listen without interrupting Seek to understand other s viewpoints Understand problems before solving them You are easy to approach with concerns Understand issues

16 Then to be Understood Communicate clearly and concisely Do not dominate discussions Express viewpoints with confidence Informs people regarding important matters Empathic Communication Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood Interdependence 5 Public Think Win-Win 4 Synergize 6 Independence 7 Put First 3 Things First Private 1 2 Begin with Be Proactive the End in Mind Dependence Creative Cooperation Mutual Benefit 61 Synergy Practice Rules Work in pairs. Write down as many office supplies that you can think of that have four letters. You can add an s to the end and make the word plural. Originality counts! Habit 6: Synergize Principle The whole is greater than the sum of its parts Paradigms I value the difference in others and seek the Third Alternative Working together cooperatively takes time but produces better long-term results

17 Problem or Opportunity Synergy Model Synergize Habits 4, 5, & 6 The Action and Process Synergy Compromise A low form of Win-Win Compromise means that = 1½. Both give and take. The communication isn t defensive, protective, angry, or manipulative; it is honest, genuine, and respectful, but it isn t creative or synergistic. It produces a low form of win-win. ~Stephen R. Covey Tolerate Celebrating the Differences Appreciate Value Understand Accept Celebrate! Synergize 1+1 = 3 or more Not your way. Not my way. A better way. Celebrate diversity Flexible and open-minded Involve people when making plans that affect them

18 7 Sharpen the Saw Sharpen the Saw Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood Interdependence 5 Public Think Win-Win 4 Synergize 6 Independence Put First 3Things First Private 1 2 Begin with Be Proactive the End in Mind Dependence Habit 7: Sharpen the Saw Principle Production (results) requires development of Production Capability (resources) Paradigm I will increase my effectiveness through personal renewal in each of the four dimensions of my life I will continuously improve Production Effectiveness P/PC Balance Desired Results Production Capability Assets

19 Four Dimensions Physical Mental Spiritual Social/Emotional What Makes Us Healthy Live! Physical health, diet, exercise Learn! Mental, intellectual, read Leave a legacy! Spiritual/meaningful, meditation, worship Love! social/emotional connection with friends and family Sharpen the Saw Care for your physical well-being Encourage and support the development of others Take time to find enjoyment and meaning in life Find ways to improve Competent in your field of work 7 Habits Habit 1 Be Proactive: Habit of Personal Vision Habit 2 Begin with the End in Mind: Habit of Personal Leadership Habit 3 Put First Things First: Habit of Personal Management Habit 4 Think Win-Win: Habit of Interpersonal Leadership Habit 5 Seek First to Understand Understood: Habit of Communication Habit 6 Synergize: Habit of Creative Cooperation Habit 7 Sharpen the Saw: Habit of Self-Renewal