A conversation about being an effective coach

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1 A conversation about being an effective coach Coaching for Coaches: Techniques, Tips, Suggestions 1

2 A Conversation About How to be an Effective Coach This session will focus on what coaches have learned about what works in coaching. Hargrove, R. (2003) Masterful Coaching, Jossey- Bass/Pfeiffer, San Francisco. Is anyone here for a different purpose? 2

3 What is Coaching? Coaching is a form of development in which a person called a coach supports a learner or client in achieving a specific personal or professional goal. The learner is sometimes called a coachee. Occasionally, coaching may mean an informal relationship between two people, of whom one has more experience and expertise than the other and offers advice and guidance as the latter learns; but coaching differs from mentoring in focusing on specific tasks or objectives, as opposed to general goals or overall development. Wikipedia 3

4 Coaching Relationships Long Term: coaching to create a breakthrough Brief Incident: coaching to produce an immediate result (outcome) Hybrid: coaching wrt an incident within a long term coaching relationship Today we will be talking about Brief Incident Coaching. 4

5 What is a Coach? A coach is someone who tells you what you don't want to hear, who has you see what you don't want to see, so you can be who you have always known you could be. Tom Landry And does it in a way that engages the coachee. 5

6 Step 1 Permission to Coach You cannot coach into no listening. 6

7 Step 2 Establish Trust Coaching is Founded on Confidentiality and Trust Coaching can be successful only if coachees are able to discuss every aspect of an issue or challenge with their coach. The coach may need to listen to personal problems or private information that must be kept confidential. (Unless, of course, it involves criminal activity or activities harmful to the team, its clients or the organization; or affects the safety and welfare of other people.) 7

8 When the student is ready the teacher will appear.. Lao Tzu 8

9 Step 3 Align your self with the Coachee s goal What is the coachee interested in achieving or accomplishing? Do Not ASS-U-ME Discover or Create: Peel the Onion! 9

10 Step 4 The Solution to the Coachee's Issue [often] Lies Within the Coachee This may sound unusual, but it means that the background of an issue and the options available are generally known to the coachee. The coach's job is to ask the right questions to help coachees arrive at their own conclusions. As we've said before, this is a very powerful way of helping people to change. When we do change to people they experience it as violence, when people do change to themselves they experience it as liberation. Rosabeth Moss Kantor Listen, Learn, Repeat 10

11 Great Coaches Truly Listen Avoid Assumptions Avoid putting words into people s mouths Avoid promoting their own views and preferences Encourage others to generate ideas Exercise power with rather than power over people Help people stay on track Help people to make connections Are comfortable with ideas that challenge the way things are right now with services and supports for people Listen, Learn, Repeat 11

12 Step 5 Assess the Situation Right tool? Right skills? Right setting? Right attitude? Etc? 12

13 Step 6 Coach for the solution Different tool Different skill Different setting Different attitude or withdraw Etc 13

14 Coaching Conversations: Thinking The same level of thinking that got you into the problem won t be sufficient to get you out of it. Einstein What do you think? What are you thinking? Tell me what you are thinking Build on your coachee s strengths. 14

15 Coaching Conversations: Drawing Out The coachee has the seeds of a good idea or the right way but expresses it vaguely or inadequately. Remember Rosabeth (avoid doing violence) Please tell me in more detail. What would happen if you did? Will you show me what you have in mind? 15

16 Coaching Conversations: Reframing The way the coachee is looking at the problem is leading down a tunnel with no cheese! Misunderstanding, misinterpretation, rigid view, etc. How else could we look at this problem? Do you know how xxx might approach this problem? Have you considered thinking about it this way? 16

17 Coaching Conversations: Teaching Use to teach a skill, provide practical advise, create a distinction, etc. Can I show you how I do it? Can I share how it looks to me? Can I share what I did in a similar situation? Etc. Stop if you get a lot of yes, but s ; the coachee is not ready. 17

18 Coaching Conversations: Feedback Give open, honest feedback What to do, not what not to do, unless it is critical 6 positive for every correction Behavior specific positive correction 18

19 Step 7 End all coaching conversations with the next Action What will you do next? Now what will you do? Who else needs to be involved to move forward AND ask for a follow-up report! 19

20 Assessing Your Coaching Did it make a difference in the moment? Is the coachee more capable after the coaching or because of if? Did you leave the coachee set up with next steps? Will the next steps be successful? Did you arrange for follow-up feedback? 20

21 Coaching Practice Get into groups of 3 Decide on an A and a B and a C A s Coach B s Coachee C s Observers Here s the practice Switch when I say 21

22 Coaching Steps 1) Permission to coach 2) Establish Trust 3) Align yourself with the coachee s goal 4) The solution to the coachee s issue [often] lies within the coachee 5) Assess the situation 6) Coach for the solution 7) End all coaching conversations with the next action 22

23 Debriefing: the Follow-up Acknowledge the coachee, be specific Ask what happened Listen, Listen, Listen Ask for clarifications when you need them Acknowledge everything that was done as agreed Acknowledge deviations from the plan that were thought out Successful? Acknowledge the coachee again and thank the coachee for the opportunity given YOU. 23

24 The rest of the quote When the student is ready the teacher will appear When the student is truly ready, the teacher will disappear. Lao Tzu 24

25 Almost Done Questions Comments Insights Other thoughts 25

26 The End?? 26

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